I am not going to lie to you guys. These past two weeks have been the WORST. I was dealing with horrible anxiety that made me physically ill and I did not get up off my couch for three days straight. But, I’m jumping ahead…let me start at the beginning.
At the beginning of the month when I went to the beach (post here) I ate at a Hawaiian BBQ place. Fast forward to a week later, my boyfriend and I drove back out just to get that food again. We had planned to take it to-go and eat in the car before we went home, When we arrived at the restaurant it was closed with a sign on the door saying they were closed for a week for a deep cleaning. We found that strange so my boyfriend went to their website and saw a more detailed notice: someone who worked there had tested positive for COVID-19. We instantly panicked.
We both felt fine but I still was nervous. A few days later we went for a walk and I mentioned to him that my allergies were bothering me and my throat felt itchy. He instantly asked if it was COVID. I told him honestly that I didn’t think so but the idea was in my head now and I couldn’t stop the “what-if” voice in my head. Days later my throat was still itchy and I had anxiety through the roof. It was so bad that I became physically ill for a whole day and spent the other two on the couch resting. The thought of going to the store or being around family made it worse.
Because I was feeling so ill, I really thought that I had COVID and it made everything worse! I reached out to my best friend who also deals with anxiety and told her what was going on. She also recently was going through something similar and got tested. She came back negative. She told me that it is unlikely that I have it and what I was experiencing were allergies and anxiety. Did I mention that she is also in the medical field? So I trust her opinion.
This past Friday was the two-week mark and as I am writing this I feel completely fine. I know that I need to be better at not letting anxiety consume me and not freaking out over “what-if’s”.
These are some crazy times we are living in and no one would have guessed we would be here in the middle of a global pandemic. I can only hope that we are closer to the end and that we spread love and kindness to all. Everyone is dealing with something wether we know it or not.
Stay safe my friends!